Casting the CFL edition of the Lord of the Rings

There's nothing like a good round of recasting TV or movies for sports, and one particular adaptation that's been in my head for a while (thanks to Twitter discussions with Jenn Annis and Matthew Scianitti) is a CFL version of The Lord of the Rings. Given that I spend far too much time thinking about the CFL and am a complete Lord of the Rings nerd, this was an obvious choice. Here's what I came up with. (Keep in mind this is all in fun, and not meant to suggest that certain teams or personalities are good or evil!)

Jim Popp/Montreal as Sauron/Mordor: If anyone deserves the title of Lord of the Rings in the CFL at the moment, Popp's a good candidate. (You can make a case for Wally Buono as well, as he actually has five Grey Cup rings to Popp's four, but Montreal's eastern geography, long string of divisional championships,  recent back-to-back Grey Cups and overarching dominance speak in favour of Popp, plus there's a better fit for Buono later on.) This would make Anthony Calvillo the famed Witch-King of Angmar, so he's probably going to keep dominating the CFL until someone puts a female quarterback up against him. Is Icebox busy? I guess she is...)

Toronto as Minas Morgul: Sure, the Argonauts aren't really on the side of the Alouettes, but the depiction of a once-proud city (Minas Ithil) that's abandoned its CFL past seems pretty apt at times, and the ruinous infighting between Shagrat and Gorbag could accurately sum up a lot of the organization's recent history. Plus, the Toronto-Hamilton rivalry seems perfect for Minas Morgul and Minas Tirith. Guess that makes you Osgiliath, Mississauga...

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