Sporting Madness

It's a pity Leonard B. Stern, creator of Mad Libs, died earlier this week , as he's not around to see how his invention is still being used in the media. The most persistent offender on this front is Slate , the remarkable Internet outlet that seems to largely thrive on finding things people like and writing contrarian pieces on why they're really awful . In the past, they've taken bold stands against such horrors as pie , criticism of Creed and hand sanitizer . As Jonah Goldberg once wrote (in a piece for Slate itself, which must have set off some sort of contrarianism loop), "Freelancers especially seem to have figured out how to get through Slate's editorial defenses: Pitch a story, any story, that's counterintuitive, and someone on the receiving end will say "brilliant!" The idea seems very Mad Libs-inspired: "[Group of people] likes [noun], therefore it is [derogatory adjective]". This approach is now spreading thanks to former...

There's been some interesting discussion lately about the prominence of ESPN's Bill Simmons from the likes of Paul Oberjuerge and Jason Fry . I've got some of my own thoughts on the topic, a few of which I talked about in my last post on Simmons , but I think there's room for a bit of a more detailed discussion on the successes and failures of different writers in attracting certain audiences. I prefer working with data to making wild guesses, though, and that's where I could use your help. When I think of broad-ranging sportswriters with substantial mainstream profiles, three in particular come to mind: Simmons, his ESPN counterpart Rick Reilly (formerly of Sports Illustrated ) and SI 's Joe Posnanski . I'm sure there are others out there, but these guys struck me as useful for a survey because they have similar profiles and exposure, but approach writing in very different ways. I've got a quick survey below on your impressions of these writers, an...

Like many of you out there, I watched the final episode of "The Tonight Show With Conan O'Brien" earlier this evening. I thought Conan gave one hell of an exit, particularly in the montage set to the glorious Cheap Trick song "Surrender", his final speech and the final song, "Free Bird", featuring Will Ferrell , Beck , Billy Gibbons of ZZ Top, Ben Harper and the Tonight Show band. You can check that out below: It was a sad moment for me. I thought SB Nation 's Andrew Sharp summarized a lot of it well in this piece ; part of the reason many people empathized with Conan was he seemed like such a likeable, modest guy, especially compared to the likes of his predecessor and successor, Jay Leno , whose picture may be found in the dictionary under "Ego". To see a guy like that jerked around and eventually destroyed by a corporate machine isn't a lot of fun. As mentioned above, the final show was great, though, and it was fun talkin...

ESPN's decision to suspend columnist Bill Simmons from Twitter for two weeks [ Mediaite ] is the wrong move. The suspension wasn't highly publicized, but came out as the result of an investigation by Jason McIntyre of The Big Lead , which prompted ESPN.com editor-in-chief Rob King to write a blog post explaining the decision. Here's King's statement : "We have internal guidelines designed to inform how we discuss the topic of sports media. These guidelines are important us, because they help maintain the credibility with which ESPN operates. No one knows the guidelines better than Bill Simmons, and he customarily works within these standards. He also understands, as does everyone else at ESPN, that we regard these guidelines as being equally important when participating in social media. While it's unfortunate -- and sometimes painful -- that not everyone outside of ESPN chooses to play by such rules, we choose to hold ourselves to higher standards. R...

The Canucks may be out of the playoffs, but it may be a busy offseason for owner Francesco Aquilini . Kevin Nesgoda of Bleacher Report writes that rumours are swirling in Indiana regarding Aquilini's potential interest in purchasing the NBA's Pacers and relocating them to Vancouver. Nesgoda's initial report has been cited by some politically connected sites in the area, including Capitol Watchblog and Howey Politics , and the B.C. media are starting to look into it as well; Don Taylor mentioned the idea on Sportsnet Connected 's Pacific edition a few minutes ago. At first, this seems like a somewhat implausible rumour, but upon further reflection, it makes a lot of sense. First off, the NBA was not entirely a failure in Vancouver the first time around. Attendance was bad, but much of that was due to poor on-court performance by the team and ineptitude on the part of the management. The team also wasn't really given much time; they were only in Vancouver for six...

Photo: Eddie House celebrates after the Celtics' win Thursday. [Photo from TrueHoop ] That was one of the craziest games I've ever seen last night. It looked to be all over at the end of the first quarter after the Lakers jumped out to a crazy 35-14 lead without Kobe Bryant even making a field goal, and things only got worse for the Celtics. This is possibly the only game I've ever seen where the announcers start predicting the win midway through the first. The Lakers justified their praise for a while, though, as it was 45-21 partway through the second, and 58-40 at the half. Strangely enough, what probably turned the tide for the Celtics was an injury to one of their players. After Rajon Rondo proved utterly ineffective, Kendrick Perkins hurt his shoulder, which caused Doc Rivers to go to the smaller pairing of James Posey and Eddie House to replace them. House and Posey are both effective outside shooters, something that can rarely be said for either Perkins or Rondo. Th...

With Game Three of the NBA finals set to tip off shortly, I figured it's time to look back at Sunday's Game Two and what it can tell us about tonight's game. On Sunday, the Boston Celtics beat the Los Angeles Lakers again [Michael Grange, The Globe and Mail ] to take a 2-0 lead in the series. Paul "The Truth" Pierce proved that there weren't too many lingering effects from his Game 1 injury, as he went off for 28 points, four rebounds and eight assists. Kevin Garnett recorded his typical double-double with 17 points and 14 boards, Ray Allen showed that he may still be a part of the "Mid-Sized Three" [credit to Matt McHale ] with a 17-point performance, Rajon Rondo had a 16-assist night and Leon Powe, of all people, put up 21 points in 15 minutes. " Still, the first big story of the night was the Lakers' play down the stretch. They piled up 41 points in the fourth quarter [The Associated Press] and cut a 24-point lead with 8 minutes left do...

Well, the Finals are finally here. It should be a great matchup, with two teams with such a history going head-to-head yet again. I don't really like either team, but it should still be an excellent series. As much as I hate the Lakers, I think they're probably going to win this one in six: they just have too much talent and too much depth, plus Kobe is playing out of his mind at the moment. Also, you can't back Boston in the coaching matchup of Doc Rivers against "The Zen Master" Phil Jackson. One thing is for sure, though: the NBA has the NHL beat to shreds on cool pre-game ceremonies. The Boston one isn't quite as good as Detroit's, but it's still better than anything Bettman's league's done lately. Also, the NHL (and all other pro sports leagues) need to go to taping the coaches' pre-game speeches: very cool stuff! I've always wondered what they actually say in the locker room to get the pros fired up, and it's very interesting ...

With everything on the line, the Montreal Canadiens recovered from their dismal play in the last couple of games to beat the Boston Bruins 5-0 in Game Seven of their first-round series and move on to the Eastern semifinals. After taking an early 3-1 series lead, Montreal looked terrible in a 5-1 thrashing in Game Five and not much better in a 5-4 loss in Game Six Saturday, where they gave up four third-period goals. Tonight, they played cool and composed and proved that they were clearly the better team. They also showed that they can play tough defensively, blocking 23 shots, dishing out 38 hits and killing off all six penalties they took. It was a particularly good performance from some of the Canadiens who had struggled lately. Rookie goalie Carey Price was back to his normal unflappable self, with the Globe 's Tim Wharnsby describing his performance as the "best hockey" he'd played to date. Mark Streit, normally an offensive defenceman who has played up front in...

An interesting combination of circumstances conspired to form the genesis of this post. Yesterday, I was riding back from a field trip to the Globe and Mail 's Toronto office with several Journal colleagues, sitting in a crowded van, listening to 80's music and reading Sports Illustrated 's Fifty Years of Great Writing . The Simple Minds song Don't You (Forget About Me) of Breakfast Club fame came on, and it struck me that in many ways, that's what great sportswriting is really all about: capturing the games, events and legends and firmly entrenching them in the readers' minds. The ability to do that turns a talented backfield from merely Stuhldreher, Crowley, Miller and Layden , who would have been remembered as merely one of the many talented units in 1920s college football and likely forgotten about soon afterwards, into the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse , who have remained outlined against a blue-gray October sky for almost 84 years and seem probable to...

Note: this is another piece on the Sonics that was originally earmarked for my Journal blog, but got pulled from there due to an upcoming column on the same issue. Thought I'd put it up here: this situation deserves all the coverage I can give it, in my mind. Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer finds himself in an unusual position this week. Instead of the usual vilification and curses that accompany mentions of his company, he’s now seen as a potential saviour—at least in Seattle. As the Associated Press reported Thursday, Ballmer and three other local businessmen—Costco CEO Jim Sinegal, Seattle developer Matt Griffin and wireless magnate John Stanton—have agreed to put up $150 million towards a $300-million renovation of Seattle’s Key Arena, the home of the NBA’s SuperSonics. The rest of the cost would be publicly funded. The cash would go towards adding new restaurants, stores and club space. The money’s desperately needed: owner Clay Bennett has repeatedly threatened to relocate th...

One of my favorite columnists, Bill Simmons, has been writing a lot about the impending demise of the Seattle SuperSonics. Simmons makes some excellent points about why this is an issue everyone, not just Sonics' fans should care about. In his own words: "Here's why the Seattle situation should matter to everyone who cares about sports: After being part of the city for 41 years, the Sonics are being stolen away for dubious reasons while every NBA owner and executive allows it to happen, including David Stern, the guy who's supposed to be policing this stuff. I think it's reprehensible to watch someone hijack a franchise away from the people who cared about the team and loved it and nurtured it through the years. It belittles not just the good people of Seattle, but everyone who loves sports and believes it provides a unique and valuable connection for a city, a community, family members and friends." This is a great point. Watching a team pack up and leave ...

Currently watching the Canada-U.S. showdown at the World Juniors. Good game so far: the first period was a little defensive, but as a Canucks fan, I can hardly complain about that! Canada broke through in the second with a nice goal, and both teams seem to have decided to turn up the offensive pressure as a result. Kyle Turris is having a solid game, and just recorded Canada's second goal on the power play (after the U.S. was called for too many men on the ice) What I find weird about this match is how many, including the Globe's Tim Wharnsby , have labeled the Canadians as underdogs. Sure, they lost once in the group stage this year to a very good Swedish team (who knocked off Russia earlier today to advance to the finals), and came in through a quarterfinal win over Finland, but they've still won the last three world championships, and killed the Russians in the Super Series earlier this year: that deserves a little respect in my books at least. In contrast, the U.S. has...